Embracing the gift of time with a temporary goodbye
29 October 2024Time is a privilege we often take for granted. Too many of us spend our lives haunted by past mistakes or chasing an ideal future - only to realise that this chase leaves us unfulfilled. This year, as I walk through this journey of being a full-time artist for a limited time while pursuing my master’s, I’m learning what it truly means to enjoy time.
After decades, I recently realised how unfamiliar time can feel. It’s something we constantly measure, yet rarely savour. Having the freedom to pursue my passions daily has given me a new awareness of time - a kind of clarity I didn’t know existed. Each morning, I’ve had the privilege of walking my son to school. On this daily routine, I witness the hurried lives of other parents, their stress an echo of my former self. A self I will once again return to - when survival mode and the daily grind make this newfound calm harder to sustain. I see the worried faces of little ones left to navigate their way into a new, unfamiliar day alone, and it breaks my heart. This reality was once my son’s reality. In those days, I was so wrapped up in my struggles, focusing on survival and financial gain, that I overlooked moments meant to be treasured, treating them as inconveniences.
What surprises me most is that I’m not working any less. My time is simply more flexible now. I work when my son doesn’t really need me, and doing what I love leaves me energised, so I can be a more patient, attentive mother by day’s end. I’ve come more attuned to my body, noticing aches and pains rather than brushing them aside as just another side effect of stress. With this extra time, I was finally able to seek a diagnosis for something I had been silently suffering with for a decade. It’s amazing what a shift in perspective can allow us to address.
This time has also brought deeper awareness of the energy of those around me and their true intentions. I no longer rely on sporadic socialising for temporary relief; I’ve built more meaningful connections and become a more present version of myself. I’m truly beginning to see that our society, often driven by consumerism and “busyness,” can blind us to life’s simple joys. We rush forward, caught between the past and the future, missing the moments that make life rich.
To stay true to this newfound self, I need to manage my time differently. While I truly enjoy these weekly vlogs and blogs, and they add a sense of purpose to my life, I also need to be practical. For this reason, I’ll be pausing my weekly entries to focus on my dissertation and ensure my work is of quality and value. I believe my research has the potential to change lives if it reaches the right people, and I want to do it justice. This work isn’t just for me; it’s for others who could benefit most from it. I’m not stepping away completely - I’ll still share occasional updates - but my weekly blogs will take a back seat for now. There’s no sense in pushing myself to deliver a product that doesn’t reflect the best of me. You deserve my full focus, not a half-present version stretched thin.
In December, I’ll be back with my “25 Days of Beauty Challenge,” and you can expect the occasional blog update over the coming months if time permits. Thank you for being a part of this journey. I have so much more to share, but my priority now is to embrace these special moments, succeed in my academic pursuits, and finalise my album. We’re often so busy surviving that we forget to truly live. It’s not a luxury to take a step back - it’s a necessity for mental well-being. Neglecting these moments affects us in ways we may never fully understand.
I urge you not to wait for a life-altering opportunity like mine to recognise the importance of being present. At the end of our lives, it won’t be our achievements or possessions we remember, but the moments we shared with loved ones.
Be present. Cherish the now. Fill your life with the moments that truly matter. And do the work that will make a mark and bring joy to our world. Don’t just be alive to survive. Live to thrive.
Until next time - keep the music alive and buzzing!
Carnita Bee
